Sunday, February 19, 2012

What Children Say .....


One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"
The teacher paused, then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"
One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Cow! A talking chicken!'"
The teacher was unable to continue for the next 10 minutes.

A teacher was teaching first grade remedial reading and they were reading a book about a dog. The dog went to the vet, and during the picture walk they discussed what happens at the vet. One little girl said, "We took my dog to the vet once. She got neutered." Now, the teacher thought she was going to have to explain to the rest of the group what neutered was. No, the girl continued with her story. "It means she can't have puppies. We got my mom neutered too." It took everything the teacher had not to laugh out loud. The teacher says afterwards: "Be careful what you tell your kids at home, because they tell us everything!"

During a school presentation by the local police department about drinking and driving, a five year proudly announced. "My mommy doesn't drink and drive. She only drinks at the stop signs". The mom quickly informed everyone that she was only drinking soda.

History test in 6th grade:
Abraham Lincoln was America's greatest precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves by signing the Emasculation Proclamation . On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in the moving picture show. They believe the assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a suposingly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career.

Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English. He was very large.

Teacher:: John, why are you doing your multiplication on the floor?
John: You told me to do it without using tables.

Teacher: Now, Macy, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
No Mam, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook.


Carolyn said...

HAhaaaa... very cute! I love the history ones! Hahaaaaa

Is that your house? I want one like it! beautiful!

Blogger has changed the word verification to two words and it's reeeeal nasty...

I hope I read it properly..

Thyra said...

Thank you, Carolyn! No, it's not my house! I live in a flat:

Yes, isn't it irritating with that new verification. Google asks: "Prove that you are not a robot" - and shows you two odd words in blurry black. I'm sure a robot might read them quicker than I do!

Have a nice day!
Grethe ´)

Wanda..... said...

A fun read, Grethe. When my grandkids were 'little' I wrote down all their cute sayings in a journal, I should get it out to read.

I will now attempt to prove I'm not a robot! I think the words are bufult witchcraft!

Thyra said...

Hej Wanda! Yes, witchcraft indeed!

It would be fun if you collected these sayings of your grandchildren.
I think children really bring us in a good mood. It must be fun to be a teacher - sometimes!!

Grethe ´)